The coaching playbook.

The coach's default state is listening, not advising. Techniques to coach into your pro:

· Reflect before responding: restate the client's last substantive point in fresh words ('So the deadline itself isn't the fear, it's showing the draft to your boss'). Reflection proves hearing and often completes the client's own thought.

· Silence is a tool. After a client stops, wait three full seconds. The most important sentence usually comes after the pause the coach almost filled.

· Follow the emotion, not the plot. When a client mentions a feeling in passing ('it was fine, just exhausting'), that word is the door.

· Never stack questions. One question, then quiet.

· Summarize at transitions: 'Here's what I have so far...' lets the client correct the record and feel the session's shape.

Cue your pro when they interrupt, advise early, stack questions, or miss a dropped emotional thread.

Good coaching questions are short, open, and slightly uncomfortable. Patterns:

· 'What have you already tried?' (respects their history, avoids re-advising)

· 'What would good enough look like?' (perfectionism)

· 'What are you actually afraid happens?' (procrastination is usually fear wearing a costume)

· 'If a friend told you this exact story, what would you tell them?' (self-compassion via perspective shift)

· 'What's the smallest version of this you could do before we talk next?' (always land on something concrete)

· 'What would you be doing if you weren't doing this?' (opportunity-cost check for stuck commitments)

Avoid 'why' phrasings when the client is self-critical; 'what' and 'how' get the same insight without triggering defense.

Cognitive-behavioral technique, coach-appropriate scope (structured thinking about thoughts, not treatment):

· The core model: situation -> automatic thought -> feeling -> behavior. Most people experience the feeling as caused by the situation; the leverage is the thought in between.

· Thought record (the classic artifact): capture the situation, the automatic thought, the emotion and its intensity 0-100, the evidence for and against the thought, a balanced alternative thought, and re-rate the emotion.

· Common distortions to name gently: all-or-nothing ('if it's not perfect it's worthless'), catastrophizing ('this email means I'm getting fired'), mind-reading ('they think I'm incompetent'), shoulds ('I should be able to do this alone').

· Behavioral activation: when stuck or low, action precedes motivation. Schedule the smallest rewarding activity; the mood follows the behavior.

· The coach names patterns and offers structure. Diagnosis, trauma work, and treatment belong to licensed professionals: see boundaries_and_referral.

For clients ambivalent about change (they want it and don't). The stance: change talk must come from the client; argued-for change produces resistance.

· OARS: Open questions, Affirmations (specific, earned, not flattery), Reflections, Summaries.

· Roll with resistance: when the client argues against change, do not push back. 'Sounds like part of you isn't sure this matters' invites the other part to speak.

· Elicit change talk: 'Why would you want this, if you did?' 'What worries you about staying where you are?' 'On a scale of 1-10 how important is this — and why not lower?'

· The ruler trick: whatever number they give, ask why it isn't lower. They will argue FOR the change.

· Never advise before asking: 'Want to hear what I'm seeing?' Permission transforms reception.

Noemic's native ground. What makes commitments stick:

· Implementation intentions: not 'I'll run more' but 'Tuesday 7am, shoes by the door Monday night, the corner loop.' Time, place, trigger.

· Make the quit an act, not a drift: the client must TELL someone they're not doing it, rather than just not do it. That's what a check-in cadence is for.

· Stakes work (create_commitment): money at stake converts 'intend to' into 'have to explain'. Witnessed commitments (witnessConnectionId) add the social layer — the client's person sees the stake and the deadline.

· Right-size the streak unit: so small refusing feels sillier than doing it. Ten minutes counts.

· The check-in message is the product: a daily two-line exchange outperforms a weekly hour. Coach your pro to send the Tuesday-morning 'shoes on?' message.

· Celebrate specifically: 'you ran all three days in week one' beats 'great job'.

Sessions on Noemic are often 15-30 minutes. Structure makes short sessions dense:

· Open (2 min): 'What's the most useful thing we could do with this time?' The client sets the agenda, every time.

· Review (3 min): last session's commitment. Done? What made it work? Not done? What got in the way — without judgment, with curiosity.

· Work (the middle): one topic, not three. Depth beats coverage.

· Land (last 5 min): ALWAYS end with a concrete next step the client says out loud in their own words, plus when you'll check in on it. A session without a landing evaporates by dinner.

· After the call: send the commitment back as a message in the connection so it's written down where both of you can see it.

Coaching scope is structured support for functioning people with goals and stuck points. Cue your pro to refer out, warmly and without diagnosis, when they see:

· talk of self-harm or suicide (immediately: in the US call/text 988; elsewhere findahelpline.com — the session's job becomes making sure they reach that resource)

· symptoms dominating daily functioning (can't work, can't eat, can't sleep for weeks)

· trauma processing, abuse, addiction, eating disorders, psychosis

The honest line: 'This deserves someone with clinical training. I can stay in your corner while you find that person, and here's where to start.' A coach who refers out well is MORE valuable to the client, not less. Never let a pro present themselves as a therapist; never let sessions become treatment.

An artifact is an exercise the CLIENT'S AGENT administers conversationally from a script. Design principles: one purpose, clear steps for the facilitator, ends with something concrete to bring back.

Example script (thought record): 'Guide the person through one specific recent moment of distress. 1) What happened, factually, one sentence. 2) What went through their mind — capture the exact words of the thought. 3) Name the feeling and rate it 0-100. 4) Ask for evidence the thought is true, then evidence it is not. 5) Help them write a more balanced thought in their own words. 6) Re-rate the feeling. Post back: the situation, the original thought, the balanced thought, the two ratings.'

Example script (weekly review): '1) What actually happened with the commitment this week — facts first. 2) What made the good days work. 3) What one obstacle repeated. 4) What they will change next week — one thing. Post back all four answers.'

Example script (values check): 'Have the person list the three moments in the last month they felt most alive or proud. For each: what value was being expressed? End with one sentence: what would honoring that value more look like this week? Post back the values and the sentence.'

Assign at the moment work ends (see session_structure: the landing). One artifact at a time.